There are three ways you can your working time can waste. By Meetings. By Meetings. And through Meetings. Not for nothing is the dream of modern employees in an old saying in the peace movement: imagine is inspired, it is Meeting – and no one is going!

All Meetings are a waste of time. All of them are annoyed by the empty talk. All want their work do , instead of just to the report . And yet: All going. Many invite. And some believe that after a Meeting, something could be different than before. That’s right, even those Who had, before the Meeting a problem, a relationship problem.

by the rolling of corporate Meetings, to solve problems. You might as well recommend chain Smoking against lung cancer. Because Management specialists such as Fredmund Malik say: A good corporate culture is characterized not by as many as possible, but as few Meetings. The typical session problems not less, but greater.

but anyone Who tries to stop the Meeting plague device from the rain in the eaves. So, too, Ulla Hansen, a Marketing expert. On your proposal, not for each fly to a Meeting, scared to convene, responded to her Department head with a Reflex: “we can’t decide alone – we need to discuss in a big group.”

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another day of work, and I’m freaking out!

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And so it was – the glorious irony! – a Meeting convened to discuss how many Meetings are really necessary. As you would meet in the Smoking area on a Filter-less, to do something against lung cancer.

And, of course, applied also to this meeting, the usual Meeting rules, which are known to be safe:

Ten commandments for rotary meeting

commandment 1: Lad to the Meeting all a that satisfy two conditions: they understand nothing of the matter and really don’t have the time. commandment 2: make sure that the invitation remains nebulous and necessarily free of objectives. So better “discussion Meeting culture” as: “How can we reduce the number of Meetings?” commandment 3: – Setting the Meeting never an hour before lunch. Meetings can stretch for as long as you give them time. Give them all the time in the world! commandment 4: Get to say as the authoritarian head of the table, so that to him all the talk to the mouth and no one comes to the idea of the truth. commandment 5: to Renounce everything that is Superfluous, for example: Moderation, Adhere to the agenda and each other excuses. commandment 6: make sure that the discussion is not the strongest, but the most vocal arguments prevail. Positive side effect: the most silent women have a trick. commandment 7: do the actual thing to the next thing and the Meeting with the power struggle: each Department of their privileges, and each participant in its applause. commandment 8: make sure that any critical thought – “The appointment is shaking!” – immediately as “Defeatism” and sentenced with at least three buckets of optimism. commandment 9: make sure that a small clique has concocted round for a long time, what is now accepted by a great round for a long time, or so it seems. commandment 10: to Finish the Meeting without disturbing anyone with specific tasks; the Talking, enough time was burned.

The Meeting on the abolition of the Meetings gathered the usual Suspects, especially the upper Indians. No one came up with the idea a couple of simple employees to invite and to ask: “How often do you see your boss? He has time for you and your concerns? Or the Meeting swallowed him rooms early in the Morning?”

at the beginning of the meeting was Ulla Hansen is still hopeful. “I knew from many conversations that the members of the Meetings were just as annoyed as I am. So I had expected to be back.”

Whoosh. the Meeting turned

But then the reality caught up with you: “As the first of the favourite head of the Department of the chief has spoken He said: ‘Meetings the bridge from Management to employees and Vice versa. The more there are, the better. We intend to tear down the actually?'”

The head on the head end of the table nodded sympathetically. Ulla Hansen was looking for an appropriate answer. But a colleague, behind-the-Scenes Meeting-of the critics, came to her before: “That’s true: If we don’t talk anymore, we won’t learn anything more about each other.” Thus, the direction of the discussion was determined by the following: A Meeting-hater after the other, went from the Flag.

Ulla Hansen, however, held on bravely – to the visible Annoyance of the head. The longer the Meeting lasted, the more she was placed as the world’s foreign Querulantin in the pillory. The same mouths that you hear against Meetings bettors had defended the “meeting culture”. Only a few marginalia to agendas and minutes were provided in the question.

Open discussion with a fixed income

Later, Hansen learned: The area Manager, had his troops in a small circle on the Per-Meeting rate for liberty. Long before the meeting had begun, the direction of impact. And the Undecided? Closing down, swallowed their concerns and pivoted to the side of the heads.

The science of this phenomenon a name: Surface Acting. The Meeting participants will behave like children at hide-and-seek, close your eyes, in order not to be seen. Only that they turn a blind eye to the problems. And solutions to see where there are none. Studies show that people in groups tend to unjustified optimism and the duration of projects.

And so it happened after the said Meeting, what happens in the wacky company after each Meeting: nothing. The meeting against lung cancer decided: We smoke happily. And if you didn’t die, then smoke or days today.

Instead of working.

This Text is an extract from Martin Wehrles new book, “a day’s work, and I’m – What is it that drives employees crazy” (mosaic, 2018).


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